Nothing Else to Do

Well...it's been a damn long time since I've updated. I'm sure most of my loyal readers have abandoned me...but...I'm sitting in Cooper Science and I don't have enough time for a nap right now...so this is what I chose to occupy myself with instead.

There are a million stories I could entertain you with, but I think for now I'm going to share a tidbit from this weekend. I'll spare you some details...but you'll get the point.

Candi, Michelle and I decided that drinking Friday night would be a good idea...we were right, it was. So after some beer pong and Music Scene It (which by the way, I hate hate hate)...Candi and I decided that 2:30 am Carter's was a fantastic idea...we were right, it was. As we're standing in line, some tool behind us proceeds to hang all over us and do the generally stereotypical drunk guy stuff. Long story short...I talk tool man into buying our hotdogs. :) His comment as we get to Mr. Carter? "Man...I wish I had a VAGina so people would buy me shit." Mr. Carter's reply? "Well, here's are the hotdogs for the VAGinas...what for you?" hehehe....Mr. Tool follows us to the picnic tables where the conversation quickly heads south. Get ready for the quote of the century:
"I have a dick like a needle, but I can fuck like a sewing machine." What the fuck are you even supposed to say to that??? Apparently nothing...because Mr. Tool follows us back to Candi's. Long story short: Candi goes to bed...my drunk ass makes out with the tool for a while...then, and here's another great quote, : "Should I get my condom out now?" This one causes me to just laugh hysterically in the tool's face, he says "What? Man, I really messed that one up, didn't I?" and I proceed to kick his ass out.

Welcome to my world...